יום חמישי, 3 בינואר 2013

Change You

My 2 year daughter is cute [I know that I am biased...]. Beyond cute. She is now at that stage where she is learning a new language. It's called "English". In very original ways she manages to say things that make us laugh. For example: She'll say things like "Change you". She hears her mother saying "Do you want me to change you" and doesn't know how to say "change me" so she says "change you". Her brothers name is "Shmuli" but for her it's "Ulli". Another brother is Simcha whom we call "Simchal'e" and she transformed to "Galei" [I guess from the "chal'e" part of his name].

Why doesn't it bother me that my daughter doesn't speak properly? My son's name is NOT "Galei". "Galei" is a word in our shalosh regalim davening. "Galei kavod malchuscha aleinu".

The answer is that I respect the fact that she is two and quite enjoy it. I don't have very high expectations of her. When I give her something and say "Throw it in the garbage" and she does, I celebrate with her. I accept her for who she is.

We can learn from this a very important lesson about marriage. Your spouse is different than you are. Don't lament the differences. Celebrate them. Enjoy them. Your husband may not be as cute as a 2 year old boy but you can good naturedly laugh at his shortcomings. Humor is healthy. We are all human and are FILLED with shortcomings. They are quite comical at times if you think about them. You can laugh at your own, too. They don't HAVE to annoy you. You don't have to suffer or forgive your spouse for who he or she is.

You can also open yourself up and see that there are different ways of doing things and viewing things from which you are accustomed. Embracing differences and respecting people for who they are is an experience that will transform your life.

[The basic idea was based on האיש מקדש page 195]

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